just got to ride it.

if 2nd year life was a gentle stroll with nice scenery with that occasional hailstorm called exams and assignments,
3rd year life has been nothing but an endless extreme rollercoaster ride...

sorry ronan, just had to plagiarise, but it seemed so apt. there's that gentle ride to the top, the times when you know things are getting tough but you still have time to enjoy that beautiful scenery, which gets more and more beautiful until you reach the top. Then there's that nosedive, everything seems to zoom past you, but in reality, you are zooming past everything. trying to meet deadlines, sort stuff, QUICK. there's so much to see, so little time, so much pressure, but you know it will come to an end, QUICK. there's that weird satisfaction, that weird happiness, that weird ignorance at that point of time that leaves you so focus on the fall and nothing else - which can be great at times, to feel bound to one force called gravity and nothing else. At the same time, there's extreme fear, most of the time unrealistic. I mean, very very few people have mishaps in rollercoaster rides. there's so many things going on at one time, that your brain stops. Like a neuron when bombarded, it gets limited. Then there's that nice little refractory period. There's that sudden turn back up. There's that feeling of getting squashed back into your chair, but it's all too comforting to know that you have reached the end. But reminiscence soon follow as you wonder how did you endure all that. you look around, having time to breathe, having time to wonder, having time to talk to the people around you in that same carriage. You pause and take a look at the beauties at life, and sometimes you pick up on the ugly bits as well. And sometimes, the ugliness is so overwhelming, all you want to do is go back to that fall - where your mind is blank on everything except on that fall. but even before you know it, you really do fall and that whole cycle repeats itself. you love it, you hate it, you wonder why you do it.

yet, the path of the rollercoaster is not our call, but the builder's. Perhaps, we are just meant to go through it, believing it will be safe and it will hold, and enjoy it. to know when to do what. to look around, to look up, to look straight, to talk to people in that same carriage, to brace yourself, to scream. to feel all that emotions rushing through you. enjoy it. though sometimes, i really do wish this rollercoaster would just act like a train and call at a stop for a nice, relaxed lunch break.